Major Suckage and Corporal Cu Chi Are At It Again

Dear Major Suckage,

      What an atrocity America has become.  Far from virtuous are we.  Far from honest are we.  Far from Christian are we.  Those Afghanistan poppies are proving problematic.  Film patrons are mistaking still digital photos rendered with Steve Jobs' software for cinematography.  Film making has become such a crock.  A little man in a box with no ears demands hundreds of millions for his video game, and the people are buying it.  They know no better.  Teachers are the only ones who know better, and we are starving them.  Soon we will be a race of Zombies.  If the man is successful killing off humanity, what will be the fun then?  Duping God?  I think not.  I live in an active electromagnetic field.  No wonder we die of cancer, and the man doesn't care.  Major, you are sucking on my windows again.  Again I will ask how is this possible.  How can air be sucked from my house?  Could it be because your air burning dragoons are at it again.  Churning night and day, day and night, in the sky and in our earth.  It is one big glorious electromagnetic field.  The Academy Awards are this Sunday.  Are you really considering an Oscar for digital stills rendered with Steve Jobs' software?  It is beautiful for you that your films are judged by a generation of sheltered video-game-playing millennials.  They could not know that Daisy Domergue may not have been as evil as they cast her.  What evidence did we have other than Kurt Russell's word?  We lie in America.  We always have.  My ears are cold.  My heart is cold.  Cold, Cold Heart.  Rasul Dufy.  Antibiotics.  Mr. Robot.  Fourth Friday.  Sergeant Pepper.  J.W. Pepper.  I hear your plane again Major Suckage, for the umpteenth time today.  Over our house you fly, again, and again, and again.  What are you looking for Major Suckage?  Are you watching over your Arms Room?  Why did the Department of Defense put it behind our neighborhood?  Isn't it time it was moved in closer proximity to your base, Major Suckage?  Maybe that new industrial park on the boulevard?  Possibly on Honeycutt next to FTTC's auto repair center?  Do they like it down the street from the Department of Homeland Security, of which no one knows.  No one knows.  That bland building sitting nestled in a berm.  Blandly bleating nothing.  Hundreds of employees on leave for impropriety.  W's quintessential department of pork.  It's a shite state of affairs Major Suckage.  Could you please stop sucking?