It is more blessed to give than receive...

There are many types of relationships. Your emotions evolve as you experience and assimilate new interaction in a relationship. As a result the emotion, love, can be defined and expressed in different ways. The recent news story of Mark K. Latourneau's marriage to her former student is a perfect example of the many ways love can be perceived and expressed. Looking at Ms. Latourneau, her demeanor reminds me of my first love. She is beaming with happiness, and they seem to have a very physical, intimate connection. This was my experience in my first relationship. I was lucky that I received this gift early in my life. What I had was such a pleasant change from the bullying of a predominantly African-American junior high school, I savored every minutiae of the experience. In fact as I reflect now, I can barely remember what it would be like to be in that state of mind. Betrothed to someone. Committed to someone in the most private and intimate way. At that age (which was 16) you don't realize the majority of your energy is exhausted on only one person. You receive enough spiritually through that one person to feel complete, so it is of no consequence other relationships flounder or stop completely. In essence you become co-dependent upon that person. If you are receiving all the things you seem to need at the time, it probably wouldn't seem abnormal. Many years later my perception of love is different. I made a conscious decision after re-experiencing the feeling of that early relationship to become independent. To be truly fulfilled you have to be able to find love within yourself. How else can you give love if you cannot find it within yourself? That seems like a daunting task and even one that may seem unsupportive of our whole dependence upon the "family unit" as a building block of American society. My views about love changed as I grew older, and that former interpretation no longer was relevant to my life as an adult. Did I want to become dependent on only one person, my wife? Do I want to live in a vacuum where every emotional turn will be experienced and reciprocated by only one person, or a family? I don't want that, and that decision has hampered my life as an adult in the United States. It is unusual, because the family unit (husband/wife) has been the traditional model for domestic life in the US. I still believe marriage is a sacred institution that doesn't need to be redefined. I do believe love can be expressed in many ways, liberal to conservative, just the way our country should suggest. Are we succeeding in upholding this view? I believe not. I think in recent years a Totalitarian perspective was set in place, and we have been feeling the effects of it. First the very basis of our lives, critical thinking, seems to have been replaced with complacent, apathetic inactivity. Is this because the American people don't care? It is not important enough to get up off the couch and go vote anymore? Is that because people feel that vote will not be effective? It would be easy to think that seeing as our government has turned into one great polling and lobbying machine. Gone are the days when individual politicians used their educations and experience to develop a philosophy of government and life and ran based on those beliefs. Government has become big business, and that change is killing the ideology upon which this country was founded. Checks and balances. Freedom of speech. Privacy. Protest. The essential elements that defined this country are being tossed aside at the suggestion of our bosses, and the Supreme Court recently ruled we are not protected from that aggression by the right of free speech. We have been led to believe we the people are required to submit to this ludicrous plan. Our government is not supposed to be big business. Our president, even in times of war, simply cannot rewrite the constitution to enact an agenda known only to him and his party. Institutions sustain throughout the course of time. That is why they are called institutions. Marriage is an institution, but so is our Constitution. If President Bush is going to suggest the sacrament of marriage cannot be redefined at the state level, he must also concede it is not within his power to rewrite the constitution. The needs of our country are not more important than the needs of a gay couple, because the gay couple is our country. To suggest a president can take liberties with the law during a time of war to protect this country is hypocritical, because the gay couple's needs are equally as important, because they are this country. To take this liberty would mean President Bush has to concede and allow gays to marry. Government by the people, for the people. We are suffering as a nation because of education. Public education is the only empowerment we have. Without it our population is destined to flip burgers. Where will our people gain the knowledge they need to be successful in life? Only the rich can afford private education. With a lack of emphasis on public education, our country has slipped into an appalling abyss of egocentric complacency. No wonder there is no talent on television or in the arts. No wonder we are slipping behind as a super power. No wonder SAT scores are lower than ever before. If we don't provide free education to our populace, then our future as a country is doomed. There is no one with enough wisdom or education to solve the complex problems that confront our very existence. I ask in all earnestness for the Baby Boomers to step aside. I ask that old money move over and make room for the existence the youthful population of this country deserves. I am still waiting. I watch as veterans earn pensions, geriatrics earn retirement pay and social security, and historical patriotic holidays fail because we as a country are not supporting the new generation. We have not nurtured a populace that is going to take over this country. Doe eyed youths look empty headedly into space as veterans wave flags about World War ll. We have not had a war that meant something to US. This country really has not given us anything. Education is neglected. Social Security is tapped. Constitutional priviledges of privacy and pursuits of happiness have been eroded. There is no doubt a Totalitarian movement exists that has short changed the core of this country. Luckily it is beginning to fail. I am going to ask what my country can do for me. It's about time.